So, I’ve been married just over a month now, and living with Mr. T for a month since our big fat Indian/Pakistani wedding. We’ve settled into a routine where we roll out of bed in the morning albeit very reluctantly as we both love our sleep and I make him breakfast and lunch, send him on his merry way and then catch a few zzzs until either my mum or one of my in-laws calls me to wake me up lol! The last few weekends have been busy hosting my parents and my in-laws, and I admit I haven’t taken care of myself at all, and got a little ill. God bless Mr. T as I think it was his first time looking after me when I felt poorly and he did a fantastic job alhamdulillah.
It’s been a bit of a surreal experience, and with people constantly asking me how is married life going, you have to wonder how honest is too honest? On the one hand I love being married to Mr. T and I am grateful for the incredibly welcoming family I married into. On the other hand, I miss my mum and dad. Especially my mum. Hearing her voice every day is not the same as being with her 24/7 though and it’s hard to put into words to people that whilst Mr. T and his family are doing their utmost to help me adjust to my new life, I still feel sad sometimes.
So, for the most part, I tell people married life is great alhamdulillah. I’m trying to adjust to a new place, new sights and sounds and to being on my own for most of the day. Even before we were married, I told Mr. T I wanted to take my time to find my place in our new home. I really do want to go back to work and am keen to find a job, but I am unpacking things emotionally and physically at my own pace and my husband bless his heart understands that. Other people just don’t.
For any person whether they’re 18 or not moving out of your family home is an experience that takes time to adjust to, and it takes time to figure things out on your own. It’s a sense of trying to adjust to a new place but knowing that whilst you are always welcome in your parents home, it is not your home any more, and that hurts more than I thought it did.
However, things are looking up alhamdulillah. I’m getting familiar with the surroundings, I’ve started going on little walks and one day soon inshallah I may even brave the tube! It’s all about baby steps and having an understanding partner to help you get settled into the next phase of your life.
How did you cope when you first moved out?